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(Containing
May - December 1997 lists)
May
list - Nabiki||June list - Kuno||July
list - Ukyou||August list - Mousse||September
list - Kasumi||October list - Gosunkugi||November
list - Shampoo||December list - Happosai||Back
to the current Ranma 1/2 Library "Too Much Ranma..."
Lists
You
know you're into too much Ranma 1/2 when...
"When
you think of Nabiki giving you a loan."
"You
fantasize about Nabiki selling you something, anything."
"You
wonder if Nabiki's earnings actually pay for the normal
amounts of damage done daily to the Tendo residence!"
"You
start every sentance just like Nabiki -- "Really
Baby..."! (ie: "Really Kuno Baby...")"
"You
are asked for an example of a "Too much Ranma" for Nabiki,
and all you can think of are 30 or so examples for that
adorable Mousse that you are obsessed with... ^_^ ((hey,
I did _try_ to think of a Nabiki one...))"
"You
swear the bank manager is Nabiki Tendo(got the interest?)"
"You
begin to think that the computer you are using is secretly
transferring money from your account to Nabiki's."
"You
think Nabiki's Guide to Extortion (on the net) is the
second most important reference in your life, right
next to the Bible."
"When
you call your photo album "Nabiki's Little Extortion
and Blackmail Book"."
"You
see Nabiki Tendo at the IRS office!"
"You
know exactly how much yen Nabiki has extorted altogether."
"Nabiki
Tendou starts looking REAL foxy in those cutoff shorts
of hers."
"You
think that your entire school is filled with blackmail
pictures of you taken by Nabiki."
"You
think Nabiki is blackmailing you for 1000 yen because
she caught you buying another Ranma 1/2 comic and some
of the new videos."
"You
think Nabiki is blackmailing you for buying a Ranma
screen saver when you don't even own a computer."
"You
cut your hair like Nabiki Tendou's and LIKE IT ! (No
offence to Nabiki she's my fav)"
"You
start getting bills from Nabiki For nissen yen for your
Osage No Onna (pig-tailed Goddess) set."
"You
begin selling Nabiki pictures."
"You
think Nabiki is taking pictures of you while you're
sleeping to sell to Kuno."
You
know you're into too much Ranma 1/2 when...
"When
introducing yourself, you claim to be the Blue Thunder
of (insert your workplace/school here)."
"You
have a sudden urge to read and spurt Shakespeare in
public un-ashamed."
"When
you start calculating the cost of Tatewaki's medical
coverage."
"You
see a wooden sword, grab it, and YELL, "They are both
MINE!" BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
"You
carry a wooden bokken to school every morning to smite
the fools who stand in your path."
"You
know you've been into Ranma too much when you start
spouting ridicuous poetry that no one can comprehend
in situations where it is COMPLETELY useless, a la Tatewaki
Kunou."
"You
see Tatewaki Kuno cajole his kendo club into beating
up Ranma (well, trying to), and you immediately think
of Admiral James Cutter."
"You
see bokkens and watermelons everywhere!"
"You
start speaking in poetic jargon for everything."
"You
think you see Kuno on your school campus."
"You
see Kunou in a busy street chasing a red headed, pig
tailed girl."
"You
begin to dream that Kunou is actually CUTE."
"You
begin to think that Kunou is a good fiancee for Ranma-chan."
"You
begin to dream that Kunou is a good fiancee for YOU."
"You
see Kuno giving roses to red heads or pig-tailed girls."
July
1997 list - Ukyou Kuonji
You
know you're into too much Ranma 1/2 when...
"..
You see a certain brown-haired girl carrying a really
large, huge spatula and go crazy. And to top that off,you
ask her to give you a batch of "Okonomiyaki!" "
"You
drag a friend across Boston to get Okonomiyaki at the
best place around, not to mention take on a personified
role, such as Tsubasa and fall in love with her as a
character. (sighing)"
"You
wonder if Ukyou would go for a guy like yourself."
"...you
replace the carpeting in your house with Ukyo's non-stick
cooking surface."
"You
know you've been into Ranma 1/2 too much when every
time you go to a hardware store to buy a snow shovel,
you immediately think of that big spatula that Ukyou
carries around with her."
"You
want to have hair like Ukyou...."
"When
you consider spatulas to be effective weapons."
"When
you decide that eating okonomiyakis everyday is no big
deal."
"When
you think it's normal to deny one's gender for 10 years."
"When
you think flour makes nice bombs."
"...when
you start figuring out how many okonomiyakis Ukyou makes."
"...when
you feel you must carry around a cooking spatula every
where you go (just in case you need it)!"
"...when
you're reading all the insane arguments about Ukyou
Kuonji on the Ranma 1/2 ML and you find your self taking
sides on the matter when it actually means nothing to
you. (Yes, I have done this, BTW)."
"...you
dress like a girl to get this girl dressed like a guy."
"...when
you jump at anything vaguely resembling an okonomiyaki."
"...when
you pace up and down your room at 3 in the morning reasoning
to yourself WHY Ukyou should not belong to Ranma, why
Ryouga is better and cursing Akari at every turn."
"You
feel the urge to dress up like a boy like Ukyou Kuonji,
and if you're a boy you pretend to be a girl dressed
like a guy!"
"...when
you call everyone a jackass or refer to guys as " Ranma,
honey." "
"When
you start painting messages on the food you eat."
"When
you use spatulas for figthing instead of cooking."
"When
you use food ingredients for fighting instead of cooking."
"You
start seeing her behind every pizza counter."
"You
start using her terms to describe people. Ex. Hony,
Suger, ect."
"You
start carrying spatulas around with you everywhere."
"You
address everyone, whether you like them or not, as "sugar"
or "honey" because you want to be as sweet as Ukyo!"
"...when
you start to carry a big cooking spade every where you
go, and wear a big white bow on your head (even though
you're a boy!)"
"...when
you start seeing people that look like Ukyou in school
libraries. ^_^"
August
1997 list - Mousse
You
know you're into too much Ranma 1/2 when...
"...you
start hiding all sorts of sharp weapons up your sleeve."
"you
can pull obscene amounts of merchandise out of your
clothes."
"...you
are walking around hitting people on the head with training
pottys."
"The
names of hair care products take on a meaning of their
own."
"...Mousse
comes and grabs you, saying "Oh, Shampoo! I love you!!!"
"you
wake up one morning from a long night of Ranma 1/2 watching
to find your pockets are filled with yo-yo's, scissors,
exploding eggs, and other useless items."
"you
hear Mousse and Shampoo, and aren't thinking about hair
care."
"..
you want to wring Cologne's neck on a daily basis."
"..your
optomatrist says you are virtually blind because you
sqint too much. Namely, squinting at the little words
in the Ranma comics."
"...you're
in a restuarant, and the waiter's brushing you off,
you try that chains-hidden-in-the- sleeve-fling thing
of Mousse's to drag him to your table.... AND IT WORKS.
=p"
"...you
start quacking after got splashed by cold water."
"...
you name your children after haircare products."
"...you
start wearing baggy clothes... more room for the weapons."
"You
try to figure out how a duck could drown."
"...you
have to go through the airport metal detector fifty
times before the officers can get all the weapons out
of your clothes."
"...you
hug whomever is close by and calls him/her/it "Shampoo!"
"
"...you
start throwing sharp objects out of long-sleeve shirts!"
"...u
draw your own naked picture of Mousse.."
"...you
start trying to hide ducks up your sleeves."
"You
start to wear a robe and say" What are you doing with
my future bride Saotome. Prepare to DIE!!!!!!!!!!!"
"...if
you're a guy you refuse to date any one but purple haired
girls."
September
1997 list - Kasumi
You
know you're into too much Ranma 1/2 when...
"...you
see Kasumi in your house."
"
...your eyes glaze and you dance with inanimate objects
everytime Kasumi is in a scene."
"...you
start acting like Dr. Tofu near Kasumi."
"...a
carbomb can go off 10 feet away and you're not even
phased."
"...doctors
turn into bumbling idiots at the mere mention of your
name."
"...you
eagerly anticipate the day that Kasumi FINALLY observes
one to many freakish things, snaps like twig, and has
to be commited."
"...your
little sister comes in with short hair, you throw your
inevitable frying pan of food into the air, only to
be caught by your sisters stammering, unlikely, cursed
(literally) fiance."
"...you
look around the corner of you doctors office, just in
case."
"...you
just happen to have a plate of steaming bamboo prepared,
"just in case." "
"...you
start saying "Oh My" for no apperent reason."
"...you
start cooking delicious food for everyone in the house.
(Ummm.. don't we all want that?)"
".....even
your most malevolent, enraged expression could still
brighten someone's day."
"...you
go to your local chiropractor who acts strangely and
comments on how he/she is amusing."
"..your
glasses fog up and when you start running up and down
the streets of Nerima after a visit from Kasumi."
"...you
start to act as nice and sweet as Kasumi when a fight
breaks out in front of you."
"...
I ate good food."
"..suddenly
"Oh My" are the most used words in your vocab."
"..you
decide to be more like Kasumi and starts cooking and
cleaning all day...instead u end up being more like
Akane..."
"...you
start to try to take over all the house work."
"...you
take nothing seriously."
".....you
aren't the least bit phased that your little sister
just got engaged (against her will) to someone who sometimes
a boy and sometimes a girl."
"...2
people walk into your house with AK-47s and you offer
them tea."
"...you
never seem to notice when people are trying to kill
each other."
"...you
swear you see the locale chiropracter talk to a skeleton
right after you stopped by to visit him."
"...
You solve life threatening situations by making tea."
"...You
see things which everyone else misses (ex.- 'Ranma and
Akane like each other just fine!' from Martial Arts
Figure Skating anime) but miss the plainly obvious (ex.-
All her relations with Shampoo!)"
"...you
adopt Kasumi's vacant expression and say "How nice!"
whenever anyone tells you anything."
"...you
start cooking delicious food for your family every day--although,
if you're a bad cook, this quote pertains more to Akane."
You
know you're into too much Ranma 1/2 when...
"....you
do that voodoo that you do so well..."
"...you
start attacking people with mallets."
"...
when you start hammering a doll to a tree swearing you'll
destroy (insert scum/ex- you hate here)."
"...
when you start stuttering and drooling everytime the
name "Akane" pops up."
"...
when you try to hide underneath your enemies house waiting
to find out their weakness."
"...you
stay awake 'til all hours reading the manga and develop
dark circles under your eyes."
"...your
preferred spot for a rendezvous is on top of a kendoist's
head."
"...you
have 7-inch nails lying around your room with numerous
hammers."
"...you
stay up late on purpose to get those cool dark ridges
under your eyes."
"...you
start nailing your little sisters dolls to trees and
scream "damn you Saotome!!"
"...you
style your hair like Gosunkugi."
"...you
start to look like Hikaru Gosunkugi."
"...you
start dressing like Gosunkugi...."
"...you
notice that the nerdiest guy in your class would look
EXACTLY like Gosunkugi if he painted grey under his
eyes and strapped some candles to his head!"
"...you
bring a camera with you everywhere.... to take pictures...just
in case.."
"...you
think that stalking is a legitimate way to express love."
"...you
start playing with dolls with needles stuck to them."
"...you
think you see a guy wearing candles on his head in your
anime club meetings!!"
"...you
know you're into Ranma 1/2 too much when you'd gladly
BE Gosunkugi just to meet the characters."
"...you
start practing voodoo to get at the guy who is blocking
your chance at the one you worship... "
"...you
start taking pics of pretty, short haired martial artists."
"...you
look like like you despertly need more sleep."
"...you
don't find it strange that your girlfriend only loves
you because she's a zombie under your control."
"...you
try slamming metal stakes into straw voodoo dummies
resembling your worst enemy into a convenient tree in
your school, and not only miss and hurt yourself, but
end up being caught by the school authorities for possessing
weapons and trying to damage school property."
"...you
start calling on spirits to do things for you."
"...you
consider two giant multi-colored balls on seperate sticks
to be deadly weapons."
"...you
start riding your bicycle on rooftops delivering mind-altering-drug-spiced
ramen and speaking with very poor grammar."
"You
go to Japan from China to kill a girl."
"...you
start to beat up guys with glasses."
"...you
start dumping buckets of hot water on people to see
if they would turn into Shampoo or not!"
"...you
dye your hair and start talking in broken Japanese."
"...you
start speaking in broken sentences and wield bonbori."
"...you
stare longingly into you're lover's eyes and say : wo
ai ni!"
"..you
legally change your name to Shampoo."
"...you
dye your hair purple."
"...you
wish u turned into a cat."
"...you
run people over on your bike."
"...you
start a restaraunt and call it NekoHanten or CatCafe."
"...you
run around town yelling 'Ranma, korosu!'"
"...whenever
a girl beats you, u give her a kiss."
"...your
grandma is a foot or two tall."
"...you
call your grandma "Oba-chan""
"...your
fiancee turns into a girl."
"...you
dress up like Shampoo for Halloween."
"...you
begin to speak with a high pitched voice with matching
grammatical errors.."
"...you
wake up in a hospital after you run into a wall continuously
trying to break through, instead of using a door."
"...
you wear Chinese pajamas whereever you go."
"...you
start naming yourself, your family, and friends with
cosmetics (e.g. Shampoo, Cologne, Mousse, Conditioner,
Perfume, Nail Polish, Gel, Hair Spray, Lotion, Hot Oil,
etc. etc..."
"...you
can't decide weather to dye your hair purple or blue!"
"...some
dried up monkey is following you around on a walking
stick."
"...you
speak broken grammer and use your bike to bend, mutilate,
destruct, and destroy."
"...you
start saying "Sheiya!""
"...you
buy a bottle of Pert Shampoo Plus Conditioner and get
really jealous of Conditioner."
"...you
name your kids after hair care products."
"...While
considering what a fling with Shampoo would be like,
you start to wonder if her 'collars and cuffs match'.
H_H"
"...you
catch yourself saying"Nihao" to people you know when
you run into them."
"...your
english in class becomes incredibly bad, yet you think
it's perfectly normal."
"...guys
start chasing you simply because you speak like their
anime idol, Shampoo."
"...you
manage to dye your hair the exact shade of purple Shampoo
uses, plus you manage to grow hair long enough to match
hers."
"...Someone
asks you at a departmental store, "Where's the Shampoo?"
and you reply,
"Try the Joketsuzoku Village in China.""
"...cats
begin to hold a certain fascination for you. Especially
those with long locks of hair."
"...2-in-1
Shampoos give you a whole new perspective on life."
"...you
attempt to be like Shampoo and wipe out anybody's memories
of your girl/boyfriend with the 110-proof shampoo."
"...Chinese
becomes your second language. (Only to those who apply.)
Or at least, you learn how to say "Nihao!" and "Wo Ai
Ni!" properly."
"...you
threaten your male idol that if he doesn't kiss you,
he doesn't get that instant nannichuan sachet."
"...you
have a 100-year-old grandmother whose name is Cologne
and is skilled in martial arts."
"...you
never, ever, absolutely will not go out with anyone
who has never defeated you in battle."
"...you
get a short-sighted boy chasing you, mistaking your
classmates for you."
"...you're
put on the ASPCA's Most Wanted list for pouring kettles
of boiling water on every cute white cat you see (if
you're a guy anyway)!"
"...you
have a Chinese girlfriend and you fear someone from
her childhood will come after you with mastery of hidden
weapons!!"
"...you
fear your Chinese girlfriend's great- grandmother!!"
"...you
are shopping for your daily use, and you saw a flagon
with the word 'Shampoo' on it, and for some reason you
can't think of what is it for after a while--"
"...you
start chasing after guys who already have too many fiances!!!"
"...you
stalk siamese cats with a kettle of hot water, hoping
they will become 'the blue haired goddess'."
"...when
you critize people by saying, "Cabbage has more sense
then you!"
"...when
your sister says that your out of shampoo you chuckle
loudly while every one looks at you as if they missed
the joke."
You
know you're into too much Ranma 1/2 when...
"...you
run after your best friend (who looks like Ranma-chan)
with a camera in one hand and a bra in another, saying
'I just want to see if it fit's!'."
"...you
start trying to glomp on to girls even though you are
one."
"...you
see your grandfather holding a ppair of your cousin's
panties in his hand, and you smack him only to learn
later that he was doing the laundry."
"...you
have two disciples who are bigger than you are, yet
are afraid of you."
"...you
shrivel up to about one or two feet in height."
"...there's
this particular red-haired, pigtailed chinese clothes
wearing girl you love hanging onto by the chest."
"...someone
tries to stick a woman-repellent onto the back of your
shirt to stop you from your dirty deeds."
"...you
need not eat food, simply touch womens' bodies."
"...the
neighborhood starts experiencing a crimewave in which
women's underwears are disappearing, and the thief happens
to live in your house."
"...everytime
people see you, a group of angry girls are never far
behind."
"...your
panties collection can rival an entire shopping mall's."
"...someone
gives you so much Sake to drink, you fall into a DEEP
sleep, and then that person puts you in a barrel, ties
it with rope, kicks it down a deep cave and covers it
with a boulder covered in seals and wards."
"......you're
a disgusting, lecherous, perverted little toad with
no ethics or morals. And those are your better qualities."
"...you
inspire terror in elderly martial artists with no backbones."
"...your
"diabolical" revenge consists of minor vandalism and
graffiti."
"...you
start to shrink and start collecting Bra's and Panties
all the time and call it a job."
"
... you start to weaken after trying some new perfume
someone gave you that unfortunately seems to keep the
girls away..."
"...the
mere sight of women (preferrably scantily clad or less...)
energizes you and rives you renewed strength and power!!!!(insert
lecherous cackle)..."
"...you
try to convince people that you are the master and that
no one can beat you...at least before they use a piece
of laidies underwear to distract you..."
"...you
have a very..."Unique" way of getting bean jam buns."
"...you
start throwing pails of water on guys then glomping
on to them..."
"...you
get clobbered because you paid your restaurant bill
with 1/2 of a stolen scroll."
"...you
try make a Happo Daikarin in three seconds."
"...you
start a Happo-Annoyance-Vendetta against anyone who
refuses to bow down before you."
"...you
use the bean-jam blowout to get everybody away from
the VCR."
"......you,
a guy, start going into girls' locker rooms claiming
that a two-foot troll is out there bagging each and
every piece of lingerie and feminine undergarments he
could get his hands on..."
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