Between Sleep and Awareness
By: Noriko Hirano

     We find Akane Tendo in that place between sleep and
awareness.  She is in an empty room.  The only distinguishing
feature is the far wall.  This wall is made up of thousands upon
thousands of index card files, much like those found in
libraries.  Curiously, she walks up to one and discovers the
headings to be nothing like those of a library card catalog.
"SONGS I HAVE LISTENED TO" the drawer is labeled.  She draws out
the file, finding the drawer to stretch over two yards.
Marveling at the size of the drawer, she slides it back into
place, choosing instead another drawer, "THINGS I HAVE MUTTERED
UNDER MY BREATH AT MY SISTERS" it reads.  Laughing at some,
wincing at others, she reads the first few cards before sliding
the much smaller drawer back into place.  Curious, she walks
along the wall, reading the headings, drawing out cards and
laughing at happy moments, crying at sad ones, self-consciously
glancing over her shoulder at some.  Akane stops at one file and
draws out one file, labeled "THINGS I WANTED TO SAY TO RANMA* she
pulls out the first card and reads it, growing embarrassed by the
sheer detail of the cards.  Suddenly knowing where she is, Akane
pulls the whole drawer from the wall, *I can't let anyone see
this* the only thought on her mind.  She turns the drawer over
and bangs a few dents in the bottom, but she cannot shake a
single card loose.  Frustrated and angry, she pulls a card out
and tries to tear it, but finds it is as strong as steel.  She
begins tossing out the cards one buy one, but they fall back into
the drawer, no matter where she throws them.  Sobbing with a deep
feeling of exposure, she falls to the clean white floor in a
defeated clump.  "I just can't stand it, no one should know this,
who wrote these?" she screams, holding up one of the cards,
failing to notice that it is written in her own handwriting.
Again falling to the floor, Akane crumbles under the weight of
self-judgment.

****************************************************************************** *************

Not my characters.


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